Turning water into wine


Is there anything gayer than the remix? Remixes can turn an awful song into a gem or an already club banger into a rave joint. Case in point: The Todd Terry remix of EVerything But The Girl's "Missing". That song was awful and with a crappy club remix, it scored #1 on almost every chart on this musical planet. WTF? This means a few things...

1. Gays will buy anything with a 4/4 house beat.

2. Gays LOVE to dance (I do it in my home!).

3. Remixers know what we want.

Another case in point: Remixes can turn an ordinary song nobody ever will hear super popular. Who remembers "Cold Rock A Party" by MC Lyte? NOBODY! Because the general public only remembers the Bad Boy Remix featuring Missy Elliott and the occasional gruff "uh" from P. Diddy/Puff Daddy/Diddy/Sean Whatever. Let's break down a few songs that have gotten better with the remix treatment:

Shakira - She Wolf (Moto Blanco Radio Mix)

Any of the remixes is better than that tinny hollow sounding "She Wolf" song Shakira decided to release. That song sounds so underproduced and so crappy, I could make a better song on Garageband (And I have!). Seriously, come on. I'm not buying a record of crappy MIDI sounding shit. However, the Moto Blanco Radio Mix takes this piece of shit and turns it into a 90's dancefloor gem...strings, handclaps, and disco piano chords thrown in as well. Love it.

Natalie Imbruglia - Want (Cassette Club Remix)

I haven't heard from this bitch in years, so imagine my surprise to hear her new single "Want" and being blown away from it. It's already kind of a club song, with strings, disco beats, and a fat bassline. This remix just took that song (written by Coldplay!) and made it more atmospheric in the late night chill out sense. It's pretty good. That and the Blunt Laser Remix.

Death From Above 1979 - Black History Month (Girl On Girl Revision ft. Owen Pallett)

This song just rules. It ruled before the remix, and it rules after the remix. I love anything Owen Pallett puts his cute gay fingers on. Love him.


Also for some reason, this picture of Ken from Street Fighter fame showed up in Google image search for "remix". Hadouken!

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