Showing posts with label joan jett. Show all posts
Showing posts with label joan jett. Show all posts

New Runaways trailer


A new full length trailer for the totally lesbionic Runaways movie has been put on the 'net! Here's a synopsis: every time we see Kristen Stewart's Joan Jett she's making some kind of lesbian sex eyes at Dakota Fanning's Cherie Currie, the end. It's such a total lez fest I can't even really deal with it right now.

Besides teenage lesbianism, I guess this movie is about a rock band. KStew and DakFan (there's really no good way to give her a nickname) actually performed the vocals for the songs in the movie and their rendition of Cherry Bomb has been leaked. Surprisingly, it's not that bad.

Check out the trailer and the song and mark your calendars for March 19 if you're in a city getting the limited release or April 9 if you're not.



Kristen Stewart Dyke Watch pt V

Just five months ago, I wrote the original installation of Kristen Stewart Dyke Watch. I expected this to be a one time thing, mostly a joke, just goofing around. Poking fun at our society (both homo and heterocentric) and their need to order and organize people.

But then it kept coming.. and coming... and coming... the clues, the hints, the overt flaunting of lesbianism..

Our little lady keeps growing and growing, and as she does, the gayvibes just get stronger and stronger. My crush has grown to a disturbing (possibly Chris Hansen inducing) level, and I'm wondering when she's gonna buy a carabiner keychain.

Anyways, The Runaways made it's debut at Sundance this weekend, and Kristen Stewart! Interviews, the red carpet, standing next to Dakota Fanning, it's obvious how un-groomed for celebrity she is. Wearing a ratty hoody She's so wonderfully awkward, and you could make a severe drinking game out of how many sentences she's unable to finish (hint: all of them)





In the beginning of this video, you can see Kris walking the carpet, and she spies the interviewers out of the corner of her eye. She tries to avoid eye contact and make a beeline for the exit, as her .. manager? mom? chaperone? who knows .. escorts her towards them muttering "you've gotta... you gotta..." Poor thing! It's nearly painful to watch her being interviewed. You know she just wants to go home and listen to some 'vintage' sleater-kinney and be done with it.

She geeks out about spending so much time with Joan Jett and what an inspiration she is to her, but the real goodies start at 1:30.
First, an interviewer asks her if it's "great to be a rock chick", which is just a stupid question altogether, but Kris' smirk and "Yeahhh......" is worth your time. Then, and you can hardly hear the question, but someone asks what it was like "getting it on" with Dakota Fanning... I can't even describe how amazingly adorable her stuttering answer is... "Uh it's just uh something we like.. did....."




This video shows the obvious difference between Dakota and Kristen as celebrities. You can tell that Dakota is trying really hard to seem relaxed and not polished and coached,and Kristen is trying not to run out of the room screaming. Dakota's like "i'm wearing a leather jacket! feel my rebellion!!" and Kristen's like "is there a Good Vibes around here?"

The interviewer asks about the kissing scene at around 2:38, and this is so so so good. Kristen shakes her head and goes "it was horrible! ... I hated doing it", after which they both look at each other and laugh. Dakota seems kind of annoyed and says "she's kidding, everybody...." before Kstew tries to lovingly calm her down for insulting her, to which she pulls away going "No!! What???". The final verdict on the kiss from miss thing herself? "It was cool"



Finally, we have Kris gushing about the strength of her mentor and possible older lady crush object Joan Jett. The key to this final video is to insert the word "lesbian" any time she pauses awkwardly (@ :11, :16, :26, + :28). It totally works! ok, ok, the last one, you'd need to insert "was a lesbian". my bad. either way, it's so clear that she's trying to say that Joan Jett is an inspiration to dyke bitches everywhere. She has to make it look like a film with feminist undertones, instead of a big old lez fest. Understood, Kris, I smell what you're cooking.

I'm totally going to fight the hordes of teen girls to see this on opening night. I'll bring a flask, some mace, and a signed picture of Robert Pattinson to ward them off if need be, but I will be there. I might dress up, maybe take pictures... then maybe get arrested for taking pictures of teen girls dressed as Cherie Curie... get a talkin' to by Chris Hanson.. drink some ice tea....

or... maybe it'll leak online first! and I'll be sure to share the link if one pops up.
Come on nerds, hook us up!!

History! KStew Dyke Watch parts 1 - 2 - 3 and 4

Kristen Stewart Dyke Watch pt V

Just five months ago, I wrote the original installation of Kristen Stewart Dyke Watch. I expected this to be a one time thing, mostly a joke, just goofing around. Poking fun at our society (both homo and heterocentric) and their need to order and organize people.

But then it kept coming.. and coming... and coming... the clues, the hints, the overt flaunting of lesbianism..

Our little lady keeps growing and growing, and as she does, the gayvibes just get stronger and stronger. My crush has grown to a disturbing (possibly Chris Hansen inducing) level, and I'm wondering when she's gonna buy a carabiner keychain.

Anyways, The Runaways made it's debut at Sundance this weekend, and Kristen Stewart! Interviews, the red carpet, standing next to Dakota Fanning, it's obvious how un-groomed for celebrity she is. Wearing a ratty hoody She's so wonderfully awkward, and you could make a severe drinking game out of how many sentences she's unable to finish (hint: all of them)





In the beginning of this video, you can see Kris walking the carpet, and she spies the interviewers out of the corner of her eye. She tries to avoid eye contact and make a beeline for the exit, as her .. manager? mom? chaperone? who knows .. escorts her towards them muttering "you've gotta... you gotta..." Poor thing! It's nearly painful to watch her being interviewed. You know she just wants to go home and listen to some 'vintage' sleater-kinney and be done with it.

She geeks out about spending so much time with Joan Jett and what an inspiration she is to her, but the real goodies start at 1:30.
First, an interviewer asks her if it's "great to be a rock chick", which is just a stupid question altogether, but Kris' smirk and "Yeahhh......" is worth your time. Then, and you can hardly hear the question, but someone asks what it was like "getting it on" with Dakota Fanning... I can't even describe how amazingly adorable her stuttering answer is... "Uh it's just uh something we like.. did....."




This video shows the obvious difference between Dakota and Kristen as celebrities. You can tell that Dakota is trying really hard to seem relaxed and not polished and coached,and Kristen is trying not to run out of the room screaming. Dakota's like "i'm wearing a leather jacket! feel my rebellion!!" and Kristen's like "is there a Good Vibes around here?"

The interviewer asks about the kissing scene at around 2:38, and this is so so so good. Kristen shakes her head and goes "it was horrible! ... I hated doing it", after which they both look at each other and laugh. Dakota seems kind of annoyed and says "she's kidding, everybody...." before Kstew tries to lovingly calm her down for insulting her, to which she pulls away going "No!! What???". The final verdict on the kiss from miss thing herself? "It was cool"



Finally, we have Kris gushing about the strength of her mentor and possible older lady crush object Joan Jett. The key to this final video is to insert the word "lesbian" any time she pauses awkwardly (@ :11, :16, :26, + :28). It totally works! ok, ok, the last one, you'd need to insert "was a lesbian". my bad. either way, it's so clear that she's trying to say that Joan Jett is an inspiration to dyke bitches everywhere. She has to make it look like a film with feminist undertones, instead of a big old lez fest. Understood, Kris, I smell what you're cooking.

I'm totally going to fight the hordes of teen girls to see this on opening night. I'll bring a flask, some mace, and a signed picture of Robert Pattinson to ward them off if need be, but I will be there. I might dress up, maybe take pictures... then maybe get arrested for taking pictures of teen girls dressed as Cherie Curie... get a talkin' to by Chris Hanson.. drink some ice tea....

or... maybe it'll leak online first! and I'll be sure to share the link if one pops up.
Come on nerds, hook us up!!

History! KStew Dyke Watch parts 1 - 2 - 3 and 4

Kristen Stewart Dyke Watch pt V

Just five months ago, I wrote the original installation of Kristen Stewart Dyke Watch. I expected this to be a one time thing, mostly a joke, just goofing around. Poking fun at our society (both homo and heterocentric) and their need to order and organize people.

But then it kept coming.. and coming... and coming... the clues, the hints, the overt flaunting of lesbianism..

Our little lady keeps growing and growing, and as she does, the gayvibes just get stronger and stronger. My crush has grown to a disturbing (possibly Chris Hansen inducing) level, and I'm wondering when she's gonna buy a carabiner keychain.

Anyways, The Runaways made it's debut at Sundance this weekend, and Kristen Stewart! Interviews, the red carpet, standing next to Dakota Fanning, it's obvious how un-groomed for celebrity she is. Wearing a ratty hoody She's so wonderfully awkward, and you could make a severe drinking game out of how many sentences she's unable to finish (hint: all of them)





In the beginning of this video, you can see Kris walking the carpet, and she spies the interviewers out of the corner of her eye. She tries to avoid eye contact and make a beeline for the exit, as her .. manager? mom? chaperone? who knows .. escorts her towards them muttering "you've gotta... you gotta..." Poor thing! It's nearly painful to watch her being interviewed. You know she just wants to go home and listen to some 'vintage' sleater-kinney and be done with it.

She geeks out about spending so much time with Joan Jett and what an inspiration she is to her, but the real goodies start at 1:30.
First, an interviewer asks her if it's "great to be a rock chick", which is just a stupid question altogether, but Kris' smirk and "Yeahhh......" is worth your time. Then, and you can hardly hear the question, but someone asks what it was like "getting it on" with Dakota Fanning... I can't even describe how amazingly adorable her stuttering answer is... "Uh it's just uh something we like.. did....."




This video shows the obvious difference between Dakota and Kristen as celebrities. You can tell that Dakota is trying really hard to seem relaxed and not polished and coached,and Kristen is trying not to run out of the room screaming. Dakota's like "i'm wearing a leather jacket! feel my rebellion!!" and Kristen's like "is there a Good Vibes around here?"

The interviewer asks about the kissing scene at around 2:38, and this is so so so good. Kristen shakes her head and goes "it was horrible! ... I hated doing it", after which they both look at each other and laugh. Dakota seems kind of annoyed and says "she's kidding, everybody...." before Kstew tries to lovingly calm her down for insulting her, to which she pulls away going "No!! What???". The final verdict on the kiss from miss thing herself? "It was cool"



Finally, we have Kris gushing about the strength of her mentor and possible older lady crush object Joan Jett. The key to this final video is to insert the word "lesbian" any time she pauses awkwardly (@ :11, :16, :26, + :28). It totally works! ok, ok, the last one, you'd need to insert "was a lesbian". my bad. either way, it's so clear that she's trying to say that Joan Jett is an inspiration to dyke bitches everywhere. She has to make it look like a film with feminist undertones, instead of a big old lez fest. Understood, Kris, I smell what you're cooking.

I'm totally going to fight the hordes of teen girls to see this on opening night. I'll bring a flask, some mace, and a signed picture of Robert Pattinson to ward them off if need be, but I will be there. I might dress up, maybe take pictures... then maybe get arrested for taking pictures of teen girls dressed as Cherie Curie... get a talkin' to by Chris Hanson.. drink some ice tea....

or... maybe it'll leak online first! and I'll be sure to share the link if one pops up.
Come on nerds, hook us up!!

History! KStew Dyke Watch parts 1 - 2 - 3 and 4

The Runaways movie trailer



A few days back the trailer for the upcoming Runaways movie starring our girl KStew was released. As you will see when you watch the trailer there's a scene where Kristen Stewart as Joan Jett gives somebody "sex eyes" in a club or something. I sincerely hope that the sex eyes aren't directed at some dude because we all KNOW Joan Jett is a huge lez...and KStew probably is too, so it just wouldn't be believable. That being said, I'm not so sure Dakota Fanning as Cherie Currie is believable either, so I'm sure the sex eyes ARE directed toward some rocker dude.

Watch the trailer below and speculate for yourself! Also - Check out the Joan Jett produced DemiRep from Bikini Kill, The Runaways' Cherry Bomb and Bratmobile's cover version.




Bikini Kill - DemiRep


The Runaways - Cherry Bomb


Bratmobile - Cherry Bomb

The Runaways movie trailer



A few days back the trailer for the upcoming Runaways movie starring our girl KStew was released. As you will see when you watch the trailer there's a scene where Kristen Stewart as Joan Jett gives somebody "sex eyes" in a club or something. I sincerely hope that the sex eyes aren't directed at some dude because we all KNOW Joan Jett is a huge lez...and KStew probably is too, so it just wouldn't be believable. That being said, I'm not so sure Dakota Fanning as Cherie Currie is believable either, so I'm sure the sex eyes ARE directed toward some rocker dude.

Watch the trailer below and speculate for yourself! Also - Check out the Joan Jett produced DemiRep from Bikini Kill, The Runaways' Cherry Bomb and Bratmobile's cover version.




Bikini Kill - DemiRep


The Runaways - Cherry Bomb


Bratmobile - Cherry Bomb

The Runaways movie trailer



A few days back the trailer for the upcoming Runaways movie starring our girl KStew was released. As you will see when you watch the trailer there's a scene where Kristen Stewart as Joan Jett gives somebody "sex eyes" in a club or something. I sincerely hope that the sex eyes aren't directed at some dude because we all KNOW Joan Jett is a huge lez...and KStew probably is too, so it just wouldn't be believable. That being said, I'm not so sure Dakota Fanning as Cherie Currie is believable either, so I'm sure the sex eyes ARE directed toward some rocker dude.

Watch the trailer below and speculate for yourself! Also - Check out the Joan Jett produced DemiRep from Bikini Kill, The Runaways' Cherry Bomb and Bratmobile's cover version.




Bikini Kill - DemiRep


The Runaways - Cherry Bomb


Bratmobile - Cherry Bomb

Kristen Stewart Dyke Watch

Every few years, a young, budding celebrity comes along that makes our gaydars tick with excitement. Ellen Page, Zac Efron, Raven Simone, we've got our eyes on you. Lindsay Lohan, we spotted you back in your Parent Trap days. All the post-coming out 'I told you so's are getting a little tired.

This brings us to Kristen Stewart. When you came on the scene, I got a little funny feeling. As you've began to blossom and grow from tween star and full fledged actress, I've had my eye on you. Why was I finding you attractive, I don't like straight girls... I knew there was something funny going on there, but I just couldn't place in. It light of recent events, Kristen Stewart, I have no choice but to put you on Dyke Watch.

Image and video hosting by TinyPic

Click the cut for Part One of our in depth examination




So first of all, I want to make it clear that I don't believe hanging out with lesbians will turn you into one.



What I am saying, however, is that hanging out with Jodie Foster definitely will. In 2002, at the age of 12, Kristen Stewart played Jodie's young daughter in the film Panic Room. Also of note, Jodie Foster played the lead in Freaky Friday 27 years before Lindsay Lohan starred in the remake. Coincidence? I think not. Jodie Foster obviously controls the underground teenage lesbian Hollywood scene. Abigail Breslin, take note.

*

Let's take a better look at Miss Stewart in this film:



That is a gaybie if I ever did see one. I'm sure every budding lesbian has a similar portrait, I know I do. The Syd Vicious shirt really puts it over the edge there. Also, note that the year is 2002. Why is she wearing a t-shirt over a long sleeved shirt? Lesbians do love their layers, you know. Sensible, fashionable, and ready to adapt to any weather that may occur during your hiking trip.

*

They say that if your index finger is shorter than your ring finger, you're a dyke. It's hard to tell from the angle, but this picture looks pretty clear - that is one short index finger. Shown here in comparison to her well adjusted, heterosexual co-star Dakota Fanning, Kristen Stewart's fingers tell the truth.



So maybe you don't believe in Science. Well, then just tell me that these aren't the hands of a lesbian :



Is that a bowling shirt she's wearing? Everybody knows that lesbians love bowling. Lesbians love all sports, really, but more than sports, they like sports apparel.



Kristen Stewart looks ready for rugby in her knee socks, doesn't she? Or maybe she's more the roller derby type...

*


So what else do lesbians like?



SMOKING WEED
Duh. It's natural, sometimes organic, in Amsterdam you can buy it at coffee shops, and, oh yeah, it gets you stoned. I bet K-Stew is wishing she had a girlfriend to make her cookies and pizza snacks...



Good thing she has one (or supposedly "had" one, these two haven't been seen in public for quite a while) See, the holding hands I could let slide. Girls love that shit. Holding hands while wearing a blazer? Might as well be carrying a pride flag, dear.

*


You might say "But wait! Isn't she dating that nice boy from Twilight? The sparkly one?"



Obviously, this is the face of a happy, heterosexual couple. They are totally in love and have lots and lots of sex. With each other.

*


Unless you've been living under a rock, or have better things to do than look at celebrity gossip constantly, you know that Kristen Stewart is currently in production for the Runaways biopic, playing Joan Jett.



I mean.. what else can I even say? It's almost too easy to go after her for this bold transformation, so I'll just leave it at that. Kristen Stewart and Joan Jett are bff now. Again, not saying that hanging out with lesbians makes you gay, but I'm pretty sure Joan Jett could turn Sarah Palin out.

*




Kristen Stewart. Oh Kristen. Can I call you Kris? We love you! We want you! We could really use a new girl on our team (I'm getting a little bored with Shmindsay Shmohan...) Whenever you're ready, we'll be here with birkenstocks to spare. Until then, girl, I've got my gaydar set to 'baby-dyke'.


*

Please note: This is a work of satire. No celebrities or future lesbians were harmed or outed in the writing of this post. Don't sue me, Kris.

Snap Guys! Check out Part II!
New! Now there's a Part III!
Part IV!
Kristen Stewart Dyke Watch Part V

Kristen Stewart Dyke Watch

Every few years, a young, budding celebrity comes along that makes our gaydars tick with excitement. Ellen Page, Zac Efron, Raven Simone, we've got our eyes on you. Lindsay Lohan, we spotted you back in your Parent Trap days. All the post-coming out 'I told you so's are getting a little tired.

This brings us to Kristen Stewart. When you came on the scene, I got a little funny feeling. As you've began to blossom and grow from tween star and full fledged actress, I've had my eye on you. Why was I finding you attractive, I don't like straight girls... I knew there was something funny going on there, but I just couldn't place in. It light of recent events, Kristen Stewart, I have no choice but to put you on Dyke Watch.

Image and video hosting by TinyPic

Click the cut for Part One of our in depth examination




So first of all, I want to make it clear that I don't believe hanging out with lesbians will turn you into one.



What I am saying, however, is that hanging out with Jodie Foster definitely will. In 2002, at the age of 12, Kristen Stewart played Jodie's young daughter in the film Panic Room. Also of note, Jodie Foster played the lead in Freaky Friday 27 years before Lindsay Lohan starred in the remake. Coincidence? I think not. Jodie Foster obviously controls the underground teenage lesbian Hollywood scene. Abigail Breslin, take note.

*

Let's take a better look at Miss Stewart in this film:



That is a gaybie if I ever did see one. I'm sure every budding lesbian has a similar portrait, I know I do. The Syd Vicious shirt really puts it over the edge there. Also, note that the year is 2002. Why is she wearing a t-shirt over a long sleeved shirt? Lesbians do love their layers, you know. Sensible, fashionable, and ready to adapt to any weather that may occur during your hiking trip.

*

They say that if your index finger is shorter than your ring finger, you're a dyke. It's hard to tell from the angle, but this picture looks pretty clear - that is one short index finger. Shown here in comparison to her well adjusted, heterosexual co-star Dakota Fanning, Kristen Stewart's fingers tell the truth.



So maybe you don't believe in Science. Well, then just tell me that these aren't the hands of a lesbian :



Is that a bowling shirt she's wearing? Everybody knows that lesbians love bowling. Lesbians love all sports, really, but more than sports, they like sports apparel.



Kristen Stewart looks ready for rugby in her knee socks, doesn't she? Or maybe she's more the roller derby type...

*


So what else do lesbians like?



SMOKING WEED
Duh. It's natural, sometimes organic, in Amsterdam you can buy it at coffee shops, and, oh yeah, it gets you stoned. I bet K-Stew is wishing she had a girlfriend to make her cookies and pizza snacks...



Good thing she has one (or supposedly "had" one, these two haven't been seen in public for quite a while) See, the holding hands I could let slide. Girls love that shit. Holding hands while wearing a blazer? Might as well be carrying a pride flag, dear.

*


You might say "But wait! Isn't she dating that nice boy from Twilight? The sparkly one?"



Obviously, this is the face of a happy, heterosexual couple. They are totally in love and have lots and lots of sex. With each other.

*


Unless you've been living under a rock, or have better things to do than look at celebrity gossip constantly, you know that Kristen Stewart is currently in production for the Runaways biopic, playing Joan Jett.



I mean.. what else can I even say? It's almost too easy to go after her for this bold transformation, so I'll just leave it at that. Kristen Stewart and Joan Jett are bff now. Again, not saying that hanging out with lesbians makes you gay, but I'm pretty sure Joan Jett could turn Sarah Palin out.

*




Kristen Stewart. Oh Kristen. Can I call you Kris? We love you! We want you! We could really use a new girl on our team (I'm getting a little bored with Shmindsay Shmohan...) Whenever you're ready, we'll be here with birkenstocks to spare. Until then, girl, I've got my gaydar set to 'baby-dyke'.


*

Please note: This is a work of satire. No celebrities or future lesbians were harmed or outed in the writing of this post. Don't sue me, Kris.

Snap Guys! Check out Part II!
New! Now there's a Part III!
Part IV!
Kristen Stewart Dyke Watch Part V

Kristen Stewart Dyke Watch

Every few years, a young, budding celebrity comes along that makes our gaydars tick with excitement. Ellen Page, Zac Efron, Raven Simone, we've got our eyes on you. Lindsay Lohan, we spotted you back in your Parent Trap days. All the post-coming out 'I told you so's are getting a little tired.

This brings us to Kristen Stewart. When you came on the scene, I got a little funny feeling. As you've began to blossom and grow from tween star and full fledged actress, I've had my eye on you. Why was I finding you attractive, I don't like straight girls... I knew there was something funny going on there, but I just couldn't place in. It light of recent events, Kristen Stewart, I have no choice but to put you on Dyke Watch.

Image and video hosting by TinyPic

Click the cut for Part One of our in depth examination




So first of all, I want to make it clear that I don't believe hanging out with lesbians will turn you into one.



What I am saying, however, is that hanging out with Jodie Foster definitely will. In 2002, at the age of 12, Kristen Stewart played Jodie's young daughter in the film Panic Room. Also of note, Jodie Foster played the lead in Freaky Friday 27 years before Lindsay Lohan starred in the remake. Coincidence? I think not. Jodie Foster obviously controls the underground teenage lesbian Hollywood scene. Abigail Breslin, take note.

*

Let's take a better look at Miss Stewart in this film:



That is a gaybie if I ever did see one. I'm sure every budding lesbian has a similar portrait, I know I do. The Syd Vicious shirt really puts it over the edge there. Also, note that the year is 2002. Why is she wearing a t-shirt over a long sleeved shirt? Lesbians do love their layers, you know. Sensible, fashionable, and ready to adapt to any weather that may occur during your hiking trip.

*

They say that if your index finger is shorter than your ring finger, you're a dyke. It's hard to tell from the angle, but this picture looks pretty clear - that is one short index finger. Shown here in comparison to her well adjusted, heterosexual co-star Dakota Fanning, Kristen Stewart's fingers tell the truth.



So maybe you don't believe in Science. Well, then just tell me that these aren't the hands of a lesbian :



Is that a bowling shirt she's wearing? Everybody knows that lesbians love bowling. Lesbians love all sports, really, but more than sports, they like sports apparel.



Kristen Stewart looks ready for rugby in her knee socks, doesn't she? Or maybe she's more the roller derby type...

*


So what else do lesbians like?



SMOKING WEED
Duh. It's natural, sometimes organic, in Amsterdam you can buy it at coffee shops, and, oh yeah, it gets you stoned. I bet K-Stew is wishing she had a girlfriend to make her cookies and pizza snacks...



Good thing she has one (or supposedly "had" one, these two haven't been seen in public for quite a while) See, the holding hands I could let slide. Girls love that shit. Holding hands while wearing a blazer? Might as well be carrying a pride flag, dear.

*


You might say "But wait! Isn't she dating that nice boy from Twilight? The sparkly one?"



Obviously, this is the face of a happy, heterosexual couple. They are totally in love and have lots and lots of sex. With each other.

*


Unless you've been living under a rock, or have better things to do than look at celebrity gossip constantly, you know that Kristen Stewart is currently in production for the Runaways biopic, playing Joan Jett.



I mean.. what else can I even say? It's almost too easy to go after her for this bold transformation, so I'll just leave it at that. Kristen Stewart and Joan Jett are bff now. Again, not saying that hanging out with lesbians makes you gay, but I'm pretty sure Joan Jett could turn Sarah Palin out.

*




Kristen Stewart. Oh Kristen. Can I call you Kris? We love you! We want you! We could really use a new girl on our team (I'm getting a little bored with Shmindsay Shmohan...) Whenever you're ready, we'll be here with birkenstocks to spare. Until then, girl, I've got my gaydar set to 'baby-dyke'.


*

Please note: This is a work of satire. No celebrities or future lesbians were harmed or outed in the writing of this post. Don't sue me, Kris.

Snap Guys! Check out Part II!
New! Now there's a Part III!
Part IV!
Kristen Stewart Dyke Watch Part V